Positive Self-talk


What you say to yourself matters. How many times a day do you say, or think negative things about yourself, 100’s right? Imagine what would happen if you said or thought 100’s of positive things about yourself a day.

Here is what would happen!


1. Helps to Reduce Stress

Research has shown that people who are more inclined towards thinking optimistically, are also more inclined towards positive self-talk and utilize more active coping strategies when faced with difficult situations.

Positive self-talk helps you reframe the way you look at stressful situations, understanding that you will approach challenges with the best of your ability and that whatever the outcome – you did the best you could. Tackling these situations with an ‘I can do this’ mindset rather than a negative ‘This is too hard’ one, opens up new ways of thinking and problem-solving.


 2. Helps to Boost Confidence and Resilience

Approaching life with a positive self-talk approach can help to boost your self-confidence. Individuals who score highly for optimism and positive self-esteem are more likely to achieve their goals, score good grades and recover quickly from surgery.


3. Write down positive phrases on your mobile and practice them every day

Regular positive self-talk can help you to feel more confident in the face of achieving your goals, as you instil yourself with the belief that the things you want are achievable, and when problems do arise, you find workarounds.


4. Helps Build Better Relationships

You are aware of what it feels like to be around someone who is positive, self-assured, and content in who they are as a person. They exude confidence, and it reflects positively on those around them. People who were more optimistic experienced higher levels of cooperation and positive outcomes.

People who utilize positive self-talk are also extremely capable of noticing the positive traits of those around them.


Is There any Evidence that Suggests it can Help with Anxiety and Depression?

The research supports the idea that positive self-talk can indeed help with disorders like anxiety and depression. This is mainly because negative self-talk has been widely linked with disorders such as depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, aggression, and post-traumatic stress disorder.

Flipping self-talk to positive has also been shown to mediate some really great results with young people diagnosed with an anxiety disorder.

What this tells us is that positive self-talk can help to overcome these disorders, by correcting the bias towards negative thoughts and beliefs we might hold about ourselves.


Can it Help Combat Stress?

Briefly, yes. As touched on briefly, one of the benefits of positive self-talk is that it can help you approach challenges and stressful situations with a more open and optimistic mindset.

Positive self-talk is not about knowing all the answers or thinking you are amazing, it is simply about reframing how you view things, removing negative bias, and approaching life with the idea that you can tackle things – and even if it does not go perfectly – you will learn from it for next time.


10 Examples of Positive Self-Talk Statements and Phrases

If positive self-talk seems like foreign territory to you, it might be difficult to know where to begin in terms of effective positive statements and phrases to try. It is important to know that not everyone’s positive self-talk will be the same, and you should try a few different approaches to find the ones that work for you.

Here are ten just to get you started:

  1. I have the power to change my mind.
  2. Attempting to do this took courage and I am proud of myself for trying.
  3. Even though it was not the outcome I hoped for, I learned a lot about myself.
  4. I might still have a way to go, but I am proud of how far I have already come.
  5. I am capable and strong; I can get through this.
  6. Tomorrow is a chance to try again, with the lessons learned from today.
  7. I will give it my all to make this work.
  8. I cannot control what other people think, say, or do. I can only control me.
  9. This is an opportunity for me to try something new.
  10. I can learn from this situation and grow as a person.

Before you can begin to use positive self-talk, you first need to identify how often and what type of negative thinking/self-talk you engage in. Once you understand this, you can make a start on retraining your thoughts.

Negative self-talk tends to fall into one of four categories:

Personalizing – Meaning you blame yourself when things go wrong.
Polarizing – Meaning you see things only as good or bad, no grey areas or room for middle ground.
Magnifying – Meaning you only focus on the bad or negative in every scenario and dismiss anything good or positive.
Catastrophizing – Meaning you always expect the worst.
You might identify with only one of these categories or multiple. The point is once you start categorizing your thoughts like this, you can then begin to switch them for more positive frames.

This will not happen overnight, and you will need to ensure you put in the practice to really hone in on your self-talk and identify where changes are needed.

Some strategies you might use to achieve this could include:


1. Identifying Self-Talk Traps

Some situations may cause us to indulge in more negative self-talk than others. For example, an introvert might find negative self-talk crops up when they have to attend social events or networking.

Identifying these traps can help you put in more preparation to address and switch your negative to positive self-talk.


2. Utilize Positive Affirmations

Positive affirmations are a great way to switch up our self-talk chatter. Before a situation even arises that might incite negative self-talk, practice saying positive affirmations in the mirror to encourage your positive approach to yourself.

Visual cues are also excellent reminders to adopt a more positive approach. Little notes, posters or post-its around the house with positive expressions can make a huge difference to your daily mindset.


3. Check-In With Your Emotions Regularly

Switching to positive self-talk takes effort. We are so attuned to negative self-talk that it might only take one or two minor setbacks to put you back down that path.

When challenges do arise, make sure you check in with how you are feeling and that your self-talk has not gotten negative. Bring it back with some positive phrases.


4. Do not Be Afraid to Create Boundaries

Sometimes there are people in our lives who do not bring out the best in us. Identifying self-talk traps might also mean identifying a person or two who encourages you to think negatively about yourself. It is okay to create boundaries and remove these people.

Focus on surrounding yourself with people who talk positively about you and encourage you to do the same.


For more information or a course on confidence and positive self-talk, please call us on 075903 95089, or email: contact@outsidetheboxeducation.co.uk and we will be happy to help.

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